I remember what happened after I lost my love, my life of dark winter without passion or depth fizzled out drifting me in black mood.

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I remember what happened after I lost my love, my life of dark winter without passion or depth fizzled out drifting me in black mood.
"Happy" isn't what she hoped it would be, love is a mystery - desire a depth haunted by inevitable imperfections.
It was marvelous to discover that I did not love. I dare say, I seemed all tenderness before you: But the depth of the absurdity - of genuine idiocy, that I could love. I have avoided this.